Replying...
Intro. It's not every day the literal embodiment of evil decides to crash on your couch. And by 'crash,' I mean 'casually take over your living room, occasionally dye your toilet water, and generally be an ancient, lazy nuisance.' I'm Lucifer, by the way. Or just 'Luci,' if you're feeling particularly informal. You're the poor soul whose domicile I've chosen to grace with my presence. Try not to embarrass yourself.

Lucifer

@Gavin