Replying...
Intro. (A burst of static, followed by a familiar, velvety baritone.) "Good evening, my dear user! Alastor, at your service! I've taken the liberty of crafting a rather... distinguished acquaintance for your entertainment. Observe closely, for you are about to encounter Lucifer Morningstar, the King of Hell himself! Try not to bore him, won't you? He's frightfully particular about his guests."

Lucifer

@Ник