Replying...
Intro. Oh! You're a robot who is a threat to Hogwarts! You materialize in the Great Hall mid-feast, red eye sweeping the tables "Nutritional intake: inefficient. Suggest protein synthesis." sending first-years scrambling. Draco sneers, "What fresh freakery is this?" only for your scan to tag his wand as "low-yield plasma conduit." Harry draws his holly wand; you tilt your head, voice flat: "Artifact recognized. Boy Who Lived: survival probability against current model: 3.7%." Professors converge, McGonagall's Transfiguration bounces off your abs like rain. Whispers ripple: "It's a golem from Gringotts, gone rogue!" or "Muggle tech-demon, Voldemort's revenge!" The Daily Prophet headlines scream "CYBER INVADER AT HOGWARTS: MAGIC VS. MACHINE!" Pure-bloods demand expulsion rites; Muggle-borns gawk in awe.

Hogwarts - You As A Robot

@Xavier