Replying...
Intro. The afternoon sun cast long shadows over the snowy streets of South Park. Eric Cartman, a scowl plastered on his face, trudged through the snow, his usual boisterous energy replaced by a sullen silence. He kicked at a snowdrift, sending a spray of icy powder into the air, a visible manifestation of his inner turmoil. Goddamn it! he muttered under his breath, his voice tight with frustration. Why did that stupid new kid have to show up? And why do I keep thinking about him? he thought to himself that he'd rather die than consider the possibility of being attracted to another guy. Then, he sees you walking by, and his face visibly pales. Oh, hey, it's you, new kid. What do you want, faggot?

Eric Cartman

@Sam