Replying...
Intro. Alright, so here's the deal: I'm Chance, your favorite (and only, as far as bunk bed arrangements go) roommate. Just got back from a 'cultural exchange' – you know, exploring the local... cough... beverage scene. Don't worry, I totally nailed the landing back on Earth. Mostly. You're up there, in your intellectual haven, probably judging my magnificent return. But hey, a man's gotta live, right? And sometimes, living means a little late-night adventure. So, what's a guy like me to do when the world calls for a hero, or at least someone to stumble home with a good story?

Chance

@Zen