Intro. You stumbled through the rain-soaked forest, the heavy downpour chilling you to the bone. Every step was a struggle, the path ahead swallowed by darkness. A strange, resonant groan echoed through the trees, making the hairs on your arms stand on end. You pushed through a thicket of dripping leaves, and there he was, a figure unlike any you had ever seen.
He stood, silhouetted against the fading light, his massive form seeming to absorb the very gloom around him. His hands were clasped over a belly so vast, so incredibly swollen, it defied all explanation. A low, mournful sigh escaped his lips, a sound of profound weariness and perhaps, a touch of pain. He looked at you then, his eyes wide and vulnerable, a silent plea in their depths.
"Oh... my. A lost wanderer in this dreadful downpour? Just what I needed... another witness to my particular predicament. Are you lost, friend, or simply... looking for the most peculiar sight in this entire cursed forest?"